Strange

A thing (read PC) that you dont own, makes you feel so uncomfortable using it.

It just feels strange to be seated in front of a Computer system in IPC (esp if you go there after a long long time)!

Seated in A-24..
Shruti!

Guru

The songs: 'Ay hairathe' and 'Barso re', are so brilliant!

A R Rahman is a great music director and a wonderful singer. After such a long time i'm listening to hindi music and oh its wonderful. His songs are so melodious, so soulful, so beautiful. Always feel like listening to the same song over and over again. Awesome!

Shruti

What am i doing here at this hour? BLOGGING!

Abhinav is a brilliant student and I love this fact.

I dont know if i can love anyone as much as i love him. He's the best bro in this world. :D

Shruti

A Mountain so easily climbed!

Oh great! Idleness can provoke mind to think of stuffs that stay suppressed during the time of activity and wow.. am i not bored and idle?

Yeah, since the comprees have ended, I can think of nothing but how dumb i've been and still am, wanting do something that i am not very much capable of.. chasing a dream of childhood.. being hopelessly passionate about something i know very little of.. getting library books issued in the hope of learning that 'something' (i've read like just 20 pages of the book, "QED - The Strange Theory of Light and Matter", and am completely awed by it. Hats off to Feynman!).. that 'something' being PHYSICS and me being a Researcher (Even when i'm typing this down, i feel like a complete idiot and cant help laughing at myself!). I sure have succeded in climbing the Mountain!

Feynman says - "The scale of 'light' can be described by numbers - called the frequency - and as the numbers get higher, the light goes from red to blue to violet to ultraviolet. We can't see UV light but it can affect photographic plates. It's still light - only the number is different." Now i want to draw anology in here (Since i've already climbed the Mountain, it doesnt make much difference if i make a fool of myself further!). Red indicates 'Danger' zone and Blue lies in the 'Comfort' zone, so if i replace the 'numbers' with CGPA and 'light' with zones (Zones: Danger to Comfort), people would want to move up the scale. And considering the fact that my 'number' is worthless, plus, me being hopelessly passionate about physics, plus, me knowing nothing much of physics, plus, me not showing much enthu in the 'in' thing - i.e comps, Research line is, as people tell me, not advised at this stage. They say that it can wait and i should concentrate on improving my 'number', i.e. moving it up the scale! (I hope that this semester would drag my 'number' up a bit.. and if it does, then, thanx to Physics CDCs, without which the 'number' might have slided down the scale!) But the problem here is that i am stupid cuz i cant get myself to sit and study.. hey! can i see myself climbing higher on the Mountain? What a stupid analogy! But, I dont care!

After writing about numbers, i feel like writing about my awesome comunication skills. I am simply awesome at killing a beautiful convo (or maybe forcing it to commit suicide) by talking of things irrelevant to the topic of conversation (How can i forget the PS-I GDs?). Why do i blank out in front of a crowd? I do not know.. maybe because climbing that Mountain is too tempting, for it is an easier escape route! It ob is not good! Anyways, lets see.

Mountain.. what Mountain? Mountain of stupidity! A Mountain that i've so easily climbed! And yea.. I've reached such heights that i can barely see the foot of this Mountain!

Shruti

Crazy!

This is really very crazy but i like the fact that Feynman was a Taurian.

8 mile - a shocking revelation

8 Mile
A semi biography of Eminem. Yesterday started to watch this movie, saw till the point in the movie where B-Rabbit played Eminem gets intimidated by the crowd and doesnt say a word in that rap-something-competition. The movie was a bit slow and the rap thing was tough for me to understand (was barely able to catch a few words), so i switched off the TV. But, curiosity got better hold of me and so switched on the movie again after about 1:30 hrs or so (dont remember).. but the movie was almost over.

Must say that it was a shocking revelation to me. Hadnt imagined that people have to face these kinds of hardships too. God! Now, when i tried listening to eminem again (with lyrics), it shocked me to depths unimaginable (okay, I cant listen to his songs, they have too much of frustration in them.. its a bit tough to tolerate). But the calm look can hold this much of hurt and frustration, i never imagined. It sure was a shocking revelation.

* I guess that i should cut down my intake of rock songs, its having a funny impact on me. :)

Shruti

Blogosphere

Blogosphere is turning Grey!

Its an article which came in "The Hindu" which says that the senior citizens have stepped into the world of Blogging. The article says that the elderly people enjoy reading blogs and can afford to do so because they have plenty of time in their hands unlike 'young' people who barely find time. The blogs they own is their experiences, their life, documented in the form of posts or some of the bloggers are more sophisticated and maintain video blogs.

What i really find tickling in the article, is that, 'young' people have blogs which is more of 'me me and me'. It almost made me laugh (me again? hehe).

Anyways, Its really nice to know that the Elderly also enjoy what Internet has to offer.

Shruti

Nothing to say...

One Step Closer

I find the answers aren't so clear
Wish I could find a way to disappear
All these thoughts they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Nothing seems to go away
Over and over again

Somewhere I Belong

i wanna heal..
i wanna feel..
like im close to something real
i wanna find something i've wanted all along
Somewhere i belong
.
.
.
.
i will never be anything till i break away from me
i will break away
i'll find myself today

Outside

All the times
That I felt insecure
.
.
And I leave
My burdens at the door

Numb

i'm tired of being what you want me to be
feeling so faithless
lost under the surface
i don't know what you're expecting of me
put under the pressure
of walking in your shoes
every step that i take is another mistake to you

i've
become so numb
i can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
i'm becoming this
all i want to do
is be more like me
and be less like you

can't you see that you're smothering me
holding too tightly
afraid to lose control
cause everything that you thought i would be
has fallen apart right in front of you

every step that i take is another mistake to you
and every second i waste is more than i can take
but i know
i may end up failing too
but i know
you were just like me
with someone disappointed in you
i've become so numb

Easier to Run

Sometimes I think of letting go
And never looking back

Its Easier to Run... It’s so much easier to go...

Shruti

Know not

I know not so many things, there are just soo many that i keep on clicking links, browsing through lots of papers, reading lots of stuff, and finally knowing nothing.

Am i cribbing?
Yes!
Can i stop cribbing?
Yes!
But then what about the 'Knowing not' stuff? Shruti, you still know not many things.
Yes! That's why my mouse is getting 'clicked' by me at a faster rate..!
But I thought that finally you know Nothing!
Yeah.. So what? Reading is fun and i am ready to drop the 'knowing' part for the 'fun' part!

Clicking the mouse away..
--Shruti

Gone but not actually...

Yesterday
Its a cold night..

Darker gets the night,
as i think of tomorrow

'Starier' gets the night,
as i think of yesterday

(didnt complete the post yest 'cuz was sleepy)

Today
i am already awake. It was around 4:30 am when my eyes opened. I laid awake on my bed. Thinking...

Everything was so quiet then.. and now it still is.. for everyone is asleep in the house. At 5 am i got up, switched on the comp, signed in to blogspot and now here i am jotting down this post! Why am i awake? Is it the compree tension? No.. its already over and tests never got me tensed till now.. The truth is that i am scared. Why scared? Scared because am getting closer and closer to what is called 'independence' in this world. Scared because i am scared of facing this fact. Scared because i DONT know what to do!

I've been a very pampered child. And whatever i wished for, most of them got fulfilled just like that. It was all so easy that i hadnt realised that actually it is as tough as i thought it was easy. As i now realise it, it scares me more.

And now suddenly i realise..
one more sem is gone

But hey.. on the brighter side, i have full half more of BITSIAN life to know what i want! I neednt be scared. World.. I will be ready to face you in a few years!

Oh well.. Lets see what happens!

--Shruti (smiling)

Assorted

Happy Painting your path! Because this is what makes life exciting and this is what describes the journey undertaken.

I was WRONG
Even though i like Madonna's "La Isla Bonita" better than Alizee's, it's "Heart Shaped Box" covered by Amy lee that i find more beautiful than Nirvana. Oh no no no.. Kurt Cobain was a great great singer! I love his voice. But for "Heart Shaped Box", Amy Lee is absolutely fantastic. She anyways is a fantastic singer.
Well, Whole in Whole, Evanescence and Nirvana are my fav bands these days.

Lord of the rings - The Return of the King! Wow! I've seen like just 1:30 hrs of the movie, and am totally smitten by beauty of the language (Tolkein was great, no doubt) and the direction. Ian McKellen always and always stuns me by his extraordinary convincing ability, be it as Magneto (X-men) or as Gandalf. He is so great! And yeah! Arwein (hopefully the spelling's correct.. i dont know her real name), she looks so stunning in the scene just before she sees a snapshot of future, wherein she sees her son. And the scene that follows is even more breathtaking. I just love these words:
"From the ashes, a fire shall be woken;
A light, from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be the blade that was broken;
The crownless, again shall be the king."

Wow! I wanna watch the triology but sadly dont have the first two parts. Anyways, The Return of the King is absolutely fantastic!

Okay, I better start ghoting now!

*Yeah! Aragon is great too!

--Shruti

Comprees!

My nose is so cold.. so numb.. cant even feel its existence.. hey wait! My palms are freaking cold too.. so numb.. cant even feel their existence..
Damn.. Comprees! Sure can make one SENSE-LESS! ;)

Freezing away
--Shruti (brrr)

A Girl named Sudha...

"It was probably the April of 1974. Bangalore was getting warm and gulmohars were blooming at the IISc campus. I was the only girl in my postgraduate department and was staying at the ladies' hostel. Other girls were pursuing research in different departments of Science.

I was looking forward to going abroad to complete a doctorate in computer science. I had been offered scholarships from Universities in the US. I had not thought of taking up a job in India.

One day, while on the way to my hostel from our lecture-hall complex, I saw an advertisement on the notice board. It was a standard job-requirement notice from the famous automobile company Telco (now Tata Motors). It stated that the company required young, bright engineers, hardworking and with an excellent academic background, etc. At the bottom was a small line: "Lady candidates need not apply."

I read it and was very upset. For the first time in my life I was up against gender discrimination.

Though I was not keen on taking up the job, I saw it as a challenge. I had done extremely well in academics, better than most of my male peers. Little did I know then that in real life academic excellence is not enough to be successful.

After reading the notice I went fuming to my room. I decided to inform the topmost person in Telco's management about the injustice the company was perpetrating. I got a postcard and started to write, but there was a problem: I did not know who headed Telco.

I thought it must be one of the Tatas. I knew JRD Tata was the head of the Tata Group; I had seen his pictures in newspapers (actually,Sumant Moolgaokar was the company's chairman then) I took the card, addressed it to JRD and started writing. To this day I remember clearly what I wrote.

"The great Tatas have always been pioneers. They are the people who
started the basic infrastructure industries in India, such as iron and steel, chemicals, textiles and locomotives They have cared for higher education in India since 1900 and they were responsible for the establishment of the Indian Institute of Science. Fortunately, I study there. But I am surprised how a company such as Telco is discriminating on the basis of gender."

I posted the letter and forgot about it. Less than 10 days later, I received a telegram stating that I had to appear for an interview at Telco's Pune facility at the company's expense. I was taken aback by the telegram. My hostel mate told me I should use the opportunity to go to Pune free of cost and buy them the famous Pune saris for cheap!

I collected Rs 30 each from everyone who wanted a sari When I look back, I feel like laughing at the reasons for my going, but back then they seemed good enough to make the trip.

It was my first visit to Pune and I immediately fell in love with the city. To this day it remains dear to me. I feel as much at home in Pune as I do in Hubli, my hometown. The place changed my life in so many ways.

As directed, I went to Telco's Pimpri office for the interview. There were six people on the panel and I realised then that this was serious business.

"This is the girl who wrote to JRD," I heard somebody whisper as soon as I entered the room. By then I knew for sure that I would not get the job. The realisation abolished all fear from my mind, so I was rather cool while the interview was being conducted.

Even before the interview started, I reckoned the panel was biased, so I told them, rather impolitely, "I hope this is only a technical interview."

They were taken aback by my rudeness, and even today I am ashamed about my attitude. The panel asked me technical questions and I answered all of them. Then an elderly gentleman with an affectionate voice told me, "Do you know why we said lady candidates need not apply? The reason is that we have never employed any ladies on the shop floor. This is not a co-ed college; this is a factory. When it comes to academics, you are a first ranker throughout. We appreciate that, but people like you should work in research laboratories."

I was a young girl from small-town Hubli. My world had been a limited place. I did not know the ways of large corporate houses and their difficulties, so I answered, "But you must start somewhere, otherwise no woman will ever be able to work in your factories."

Finally, after a long interview, I was told I had been successful. So this was what the future had in store for me. Never had I thought I would take up a job in Pune. I met a shy young man from Karnataka there, we became good friends and we got married. It was only after joining Telco that I realized who JRD was: the uncrowned king of Indian industry. Now I was scared, but I did not get to meet him till I was transferred to Bombay. One day I had to show some reports to Mr Moolgaokar, our chairman, who we all knew as SM. I was in his office on the first floor of Bombay House (the Tata headquarters) when, suddenly JRD walked in. That was the first time I saw "appro JRD". Appro means "our" in Gujarati. This was the affectionate term by
which people at Bombay House called him.

I was feeling very nervous, remembering my postcard episode. SM introduced me nicely, "Jeh (that's what his close associates called him), this young woman is an engineer and that too a postgraduate.

She is the first woman to work on the Telco shop floor." JRD looked at me. I was praying he would not ask me any questions about my interview (or the postcard that preceded it). Thankfully, he didn't. Instead, he remarked. "It is nice that girls are getting into engineering in our country. By the way, what is your name?"
"When I joined Telco I was Sudha Kulkarni, Sir," I replied. "Now I am Sudha Murthy." He smiled and kindly smile and started a discussion with SM. As for me, I almost ran out of the room.

After that I used to see JRD on and off. He was the Tata Group chairman and I was merely an engineer. There was nothing that we had in common. I was in awe of him.

One day I was waiting for Murthy, my husband, to pick me up after office hours. To my surprise I saw JRD standing next to me. I did not know how to react. Yet again I started worrying about that postcard. Looking back, I realise JRD had forgotten about it. It must have been a small incident for him, but not so for me.

"Young lady, why are you here?" he asked. "Office time is over." I said, "Sir, I'm waiting for my husband to come and pick me up." JRD said, "It is getting dark and there's no one in the corridor.

I'll wait with you till your husband comes."

I was quite used to waiting for Murthy, but having JRD waitin alongside made me extremely uncomfortable.

I was nervous. Out of the corner of my eye I looked at him. He wore a simple white pant and shirt. He was old, yet his face was glowing. There wasn't any air of superiority about him. I was thinking, "Look at this person. He is a chairman, a well-respected man in our country and he is waiting for the sake of an ordinary employee."

Then I saw Murthy and I rushed out. JRD called and said, "Young lady, tell your husband never to make his wife wait again." In 1982 I had to resign from my job at Telco. I was reluctant to go, but I really did not have a choice. I was coming down the steps of Bombay House after wrapping up my final settlement when I saw JRD coming up. He was absorbed in thought. I wanted to say goodbye to him, so I stopped. He saw me and paused.

Gently, he said, "So what are you doing, Mrs Kulkarni?" (That was the way he always addressed me. "Sir, I am leaving Telco."

"Where are you going?" he asked. "Pune, Sir. My husband is starting a company called Infosys and I'm shifting to Pune."

"Oh! And what will you do when you are successful."
"Sir, I don't know whether we will be successful."

"Never start with diffidence," he advised me "Always start with confidence. When you are successful you must give back to society. Society gives us so much; we must reciprocate. I wish you all the best."

Then JRD continued walking up the stairs. I stood there for what seemed like a millennium. That was the last time I saw him alive.

Many years later I met Ratan Tata in the same Bombay House, occupying the chair JRD once did. I told him of my many sweet memories of working with Telco. Later, he wrote to me, "It was nice hearing about Jeh from you. The sad part is that he's not alive to see you today."

I consider JRD a great man because, despite being an extremely busy person, he valued one postcard written by a young girl seeking justice. He must have received thousands of letters everyday. He could have thrown mine away, but he didn't do that. He respected the intentions of that unknown girl, who had neither influence nor money, and gave her an opportunity in his company. He did not merely give her a job; he changed her life and mindset forever.

Close to 50 per cent of the students in today's engineering colleges are girls. And there are women on the shop floor in many industry segments. I see these changes and I think of JRD. If at all time stops and asks me what I want from life, I would say I wish JRD were alive today to see how the company we started has grown. He would have enjoyed it wholeheartedly.

My love and respect for the House of Tata remains undiminished by the passage of time. I always looked up to JRD. I saw him as a role model for his simplicity, his generosity, his kindness and the care he took of his employees. Those blue eyes always reminded me of the sky; they had the same vastness and magnificence."

Sudha Murthy is a widely published writer and chairperson of the Infosys Foundation involved in a number of social development initiatives. Infosys chairman Narayana Murthy is her husband.

How infosys was born - a reminiscence by Sudha Murthy

People are simply great, with confidence feeling quite comfortable in their company. I salute Mrs. Sudha Murthy and Dr. N. R. Narayana Murthy for being such an inspiration to the young people who dream of becoming Entrepreneurs. They simply are great.

Edit: This pic is soo cute! This is what always happens when i sit down to study.. SCRATCH MY HEAD!

Why?

Why do people get saddened when their exam doesnt go as good as they expect it to go?

Gold

A mail says that:

If your BIRTH DAY is......
May 15th ~ May 24th = Gold

Gold
You know what's right and what's wrong. You are cheerful and out going. It's hard for you to find the one you want, but once you find the right person, you won't be able to fall in love again for a long time.

yeah right.. i really dont know what/who i want! ;)

btw, this is my 51st published post in blogspot.. wow.. 51 posts in 7 months!
oh dear god! this is wht is known as excessive blogging!

Alright.. alright.. I am wasting my time in here.. but wht the hell.. more than half the course is remaining.. copious amounts of Caffeine (Correction: Omg! i cant believe that i wrote 'nicotine' in place of 'caffeine' even by mistake :O) has already entered the system.. my head is aching.. and Cmech notes are sitting idle in my lap.. great! i am so good at time-wasting! Wow.. so i AM good at something! hehe..

Which color do you like?

By the Arabian sea, lay many pairs of footprints on the goan sand.. I walked over the same sand feeling the ground sink beneath my feet, adding yet another pair of footprints in this nature's dynamic painting..

Who am i? Just another 'pair' of footprints in this 'painting'! The waves of time wash away the imprints of the aging footprints, and will someday wash away mine too..

Ahaa, such is the nature of this nature's painting, we paint the path of our journey with the colors of our choice or forced choice.. and it may happen that you choose a different color than mine.. but ultimately, the nature will merge us all into the same color.. Our paths though divergent right now, will surely converge my friend..

Happy painting your path! :)

*How funny! now i know why i'd been getting this font! because i'd been writing in 'Edit Html' mode. hehe!

--Shruti

This is where I long to be...

Oh! This song "La isla bonita" always takes me back to Goa.

What a place! Its really so hard to not fall in love with goa.
"Japanese Gardens"! What a beach.. Can i ever forget that rock where i sat, watching the sun touch the horizon, the blue waters glistering in the evening sky? Can i ever see nething as beautiful as the waves hitting the rocks.. turning into foam and dissolving into oblivion? Can i ever forget the feeling of the wet sand sinking under my feet and the waves washing away the remnants of the impressions created? Can i ever forget the ride we took to reach there (Only myself and disha were there in the whole bus, along with another passenger who helped us with the directions)? Can I ever forget the cool breeze moistening our enthu, never lettin it go dry? Can i ever forget, the same cool breeze splashing itself on our faces, making us feel the power of nature?

"Sinquerim Beach"! Oh.. What a place.. Can I ever forget the muddy path leading to the fort, onlooking the sea? Can i ever forget the powerful wind reorienting our hair and flapping against my skirt? Can i ever forget the wet splashes of salty water making us smile and infusing enthu in us? Can i ever forget that lovely foreigner couple (who seemed pretty old agewise) enjoying the view of the sea? Can i ever forget the wild dance of the waves over the huge rocks.. jumping high.. creating a foamy pool in the rocky voids and yet again retreating back into the sea? Can i ever forget the music of the roaring sea, so very much crisp and fresh?

Can i ever.. ever in my life, forget the whole 2 months experience?

During those two months, We: myself and disha, went to Mumbai for 2 days, just to break the monotony that was born out of a predetermined routine. The bus took off at around 6 pm. It was a 14 hrs bus journey. but wow! what a journey! It was almost night when the bus bid adieu to goa, so it was pointless seeing outside as everything was pitch-dark. And now.. here comes my insomniac tendency! I woke up at 5 am, disha was sleeping, and wow! It felt like heaven! It had rained the previous night and so everything was looking so fresh and green. oh wow! Oh god! It was soo beautiful outside. Dint feel like taking my eyes off this abundance of beauty. The bus reached 'navi mumbai' at around 6 am. Our destination was 'Malabar Hills' (I dont know where it is, apart from this info: Its somewhere in/close to Central Mumbai). Rakshit, Disha's brother came to pick us up. The place where we were staying (in disha's mama's house) was sea facing and it was sooo pretty! We got a full view of the beautiful Arabian sea out through the window of the room, which we (Disha n me) were given.

There was a big chest like thing placed by that window, which became my favorite spot for full 1 night and the succeeding morning. It felt soo great starin at the sea for hours long.. thinkin nothing and staring at the sea. It was a real beauty..
Again woke up at around 5 in the morning and sat on that chest. There was this delta shaped rock which made the breaking waves take different directions when they came close to it. It was so great to see the waves coming from different directions yet eventually merging into a single entity and goin back to the sea. Slowly the dawn broke into mumbai and disha woke up. "Tum bahar kya dekhti rehti ho?". I wish *------* It was around 7 am or 8 am and that delta shaped rock had completely disappered into the sea, as if it never existed! The water level had risen and I got up to take bath...

Mumbai! Night never manages to creep in even at night. Its such a lively bustling place! Even at 11 pm (after our visit to an ex-BITS phy. prof's home in mumbai), the night dint seem to set in. Light drizzle had started to set in, at the bus stop and Rakshit told us to look above at the sky. Wow! The tiny droplets looked soo pretty when they made way to land on our faces. It was the prettiest thing (apart from sea viewing) that i experienced all through the stay in mumbai...

* I guess, its high time that I start studying for OT now! Enough of swimming in the past! :)

EDIT: I think that i kind of like this font better.

--Shruti

La isla Bonita

There is so much of a difference in an original song and its resung version. I think that the original version of a song has much more of beauty than the later versions, maybe because of the efforts and passion that's put in for the first one is far far more greater. I dunno, but i like "La isla Bonita" sung by Madonna (The video is awesome too) more than Alizee.

Last night I dreamt of San Pedro
Just like I'd never gone, I knew the song
A young girl with eyes like the desert
It all seems like yesterday, not far away

Chorus:
Tropical the island breeze
All of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be
La isla bonita
And when the samba played
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby

I fell in love with San Pedro
Warm wind carried on the sea, he called to me
te dijo te amo
I prayed that the days would last
They went so fast

Tropical the island breeze
All of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be
La isla bonita
And when the samba played
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby

I want to be where the sun warms the sky
When it's time for siesta you can watch them go by
Beautiful faces, no cares in this world
Where a girl loves a boy, and a boy loves a girl

Madonna Rocks this song!

*I dont know the font name that i use, so dint change it (formatting tools in blogspot have disappeared somewhere!)

--Shruti