Haha!
I cant think in front of people, not even my dad! It was simple math, just adding 2 to a number, and made a fool of myself by fumbling all the wrong answers! This is so silly, not because i made a fool of myself this once, but because i do it constantly.. over and over again. Feels like i am caught up in a never ending loop created by my own self.
Yeah, i know that i am dumb, but being constantly reminded of it just makes me go wild. This is one thing i'd like changed, 'cause i'm just so tired. Tired of staying mum and dumb and giving everyone an opportunity hold a mirror in front of me, to reflect me as i am. I am not sad being the way i am, but everyone around makes me want to think that i should be (or do i maybe just feel it and its not even true? I dunno). When i think about it, i just dont understand what is it that would make me okay. Yeah, being a bit more confident, a bit more aware of the world and reduction in my fumbling is something that i should be working on, but when it comes to accepting something i dont believe in and discarding my own belief system, its hard. I cant do it. I am sorry, but i cant.
*Wow, deleted a whole para!*
I feel that maybe one thing i'd like believe is - Respect others no matter you agree with them or not!
Shruti
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