Vaana

...and it rained!

and still the thunders are audible!

Chitapata chinkulu

This is the story of my friend

She'd always go out for a walk along with her friends in the evening. It was always refreshing to go out after a day of lectures and tutorials.

It almost had become a routine. The tutorial would end roughly at around 5:15 pm and they would all go out for a pleasant walk only to return hungry!

It was one of those evenings and the place being a hill station, a sudden light downpour was not so uncommon. Oh, how she loved rains! It always gave her a feeling of nature touching her, washing off her worries, gifting her a momentary joy of being lost, a feeling of rain purifying her... how could she not jump with joy on seeing little droplets land on her face?

One of the students suggested her to open her umbrella for there was a risk of catching cold. She told him that she loves rains and its okay. Anyways, it was just drizzling and they had almost reached the IIA campus!

Addu cheppade, Umbrella epudu
O vana, nuvvu vostanante...
[Translation: Umbrella never acts as a barrier if rain wants to seep in right through...]

Chitapata Chinkulu!
[Translation: Little raindrops!]

Maybe it was another of those days when it had started drizzling when they'd almost reached the campus. She decided to go to room first and then go for dinner. Suddenly it started raining hard! Oh, what fun it was, she got fully drenched outside her guest house and oh! what a feeling.

But alas! It was Kodaikanal and it was cold! I wasnt able to stop myself from shivering hard and clattering my teeth involutarily, the whole dinner time that day!

Yea! Chitapata Chinkulu!

Shruti

Travelblog [Four]

Brrr, dont you feel cold?
Kavya asked.

Naah, I am used to such weather. It goes way below this temperature back there in Pilani.
I replied.

It was probably around 12 or 13 degrees Celsius at that time.

The cab that we hired to take us further uphill to drop us at the IIA campus, revealed to us what beauty and what charm Kodaikanal held! Wow, I was still to be shaken from my reverie. It was all so beautiful- the trees, the view, the straight drive, the breeze, the path leading to the campus!

We finally reached the Evershed Hall [one of the Guest houses] located within the IIA campus where we supposed to report our arrival. After a few signatures and introduction with the guest house in-charge, we were directed to the Annexe [another Guest House] which became my home for the next 3 weeks.

IIA Kodaikanal campus, it in itself has nature captivated in its freshest form. Totally green, with flora in abundance and beautiful pine like trees lining the roads within the campus.. reminded me of me dreaming of being in such a place and then actually being there! It was almost like living my dream. I was so excited and so thrilled. I wanted to explore the whole campus right away!

The Annexe - Almost all the female participants had already reached there and it was fun getting acquainted with them, mainly because they all belonged to such a different part of the country and i was not even remotely aware how people of Kerela and Tamilnadu were like. Most of them were mallus, muslim mallus and tamilnadu christians, so it was amazing to interact with them, to get to know them. I suggested going on a walk, but the idea was voted out so we stayed there and enjoyed!

It was a great summer school filled with so many memories, anecdotes, and what not!
Those were almost the best 21 days of my life. The best one still being the 2 months training at NIO [National Institute of Oceanography], Goa.

Travelblog [Three]

A swish of cool air!

Ah! What a nice pleasant breeze! The bus started ascending and its ascent was accompanied by huge mountaineous rocks and a very pleasant breeze. It made me happily forget about the blazing sound of Mahabharata playing on the TV.

Up went the bus..

As we reached a considerable height, the view cleared..
Tall eucalyptus trees lined up in such beauty as if exhibiting nature's perfection.. cool breeze getting chillier and giving goosebumps.. clusters of human habitation partially covered by white foamy clouds giving just a hint of their existence.. music of the leaves rustling against the wind.. was I in heaven?

Apparently, yes!

Travelblog [Two]

5 hours
Said she. "It'd take us around 5 hours to reach there, sir said".

It was a very hot afternoon and unfortunately we'd chosen seats right next to blazing sound speakers and the west side window seats. So, it was a sunny as well as a noisy bus ride [and pretty uneventful] till we reached the bottom of the hill.

Travelblog [One]

The flight was scheduled at 10:10 am on 31st of may 2007. After the security check in, I called up my dad who was seated there at the lounge. This was the my first travel alone and it felt exciting to be where I was, getting to do things on my own [yeah right, reservation all done by my dad with the flight directly landing me into chennai and my friends picking me up there - and doing things on my own I say!]. The flight was delayed by half an hour and so had to wait there till the announcement was to be made. I waited.

At last!

Reached Chennai at around 1:00 pm, Anu and Preethi had come to receive me. Oh! they looked so different in there. Anyways, it was a 2 days fun stay there at Anu's place.
Me being a town girl, the feeling of being in a City hit me as soon as i reached there, with soaring commutation costs, long distances, auto people ever ready to dupe you [had really funny experiences], busy roads, huge traffic. Travelling in local trains was a nice experience though.

2nd june 2007, 9:30 pm
I was supposed to meet Kavya [one of the participants of "Kodai Summer School for Physics 2007" conducted by IIA] at Egmore station and was apparently a little bit late. Anyways, we'd never seen each other (corresponded only through mails and calls), and it was nice to finally meet her in person.

3rd june 2007, 6:00 am
Madurai reached. As advised by Dr. Sundar Raman [the coordinator of the summer school], we were supposed to reach Kodai somewhere around the evening time so that all the arrangements would be made before our arrival. So we stayed at Kavya's house till afternoon, had lunch there [in between went to Meenakshi temple] and then caught a bus to Kodai at around 1:30 or so.

Choose a Choice

12/18/06

Oh God! I was browsing through my drafts [unpublished posts] and stumbled upon this post. I dont remember why i hadnt posted that. It was written on 12/18/06. I dont know why I lost that thing in me - thinking till i get exhausted. I dont know why I am so satisfied these days. I dont know why I feel that I've changed again. I dont know why I want live and love life. I just dont know why I am so happy. I dont know why, now i dont even want to know the reason. I have changed, and am happy!

There is always a never-ending itching feeling persisting in my self. whenever i think of anything, anything at all, the whole thinking business leaves me unsatisfied.. because, in the end, everything seems meaningless and unfathomable. (Maybe i'm a bad thinker! because thinking about this also leaves me inconclusive in the end :)).

Yeah, I exist and am Alive.. So what? Is it that big a deal? Can existence of 'some'thing or 'no'thing have this big a value? Why? Why is it important to feel the meaning of these words - "I Exist"? Doesnt it give rise to self importance? doesnt it kill the goodness in us? Because, (say) if i am in a sinking ship (poseidon!), i'll be more worried to save 'my' self more than anything else.

Love, hate, care, selfishness, altruism, joy, hurt...
maybe all these words cant really be differentiated.. maybe they are just dummy words used to strenghten the existence of these two words - "I Exist". Example: Love cant exist if there is no "I", and same goes for any other feeling. If "I" dont exist, then how will i know that 'love' exists or any other feeling for that matter?

All seem so justifiable and non-justifiable at the same time. Its all so confusing.

Yeah, I exist and am Alive.. So what? Is it that big a deal?
I exist because I was born (Its silly but is it false?). There many things and creatures that could have been born, but since they havnt taken birth, they dont exist. Its all in my hands to make my life big or small. There is always a choice. And if I dont make a choice, time will make it for me, because time doesnt wait for decisions to be made, it simply goes on and on. Its all about choice. The choice being: Having life is a big thing v/s many living things are also alive, so life is not a big deal. I choose the first choice.

Can existence of 'some'thing or 'no'thing have this big a value?
For me YES. Because even a small thing can influence our thinking and make us take decisions that we wouldnt have taken if they dint exist. Like, if in this world, pens hadnt been discovered, then I would have still used a pencil in the place of a pen (what a silly example!) But now again there a choice. The choice being: Everything has its own importance v/s Hunh? Value? Whats that?!

Why? Why is it important to feel the meaning of these words - "I Exist"?
The very fact that we exist is the reason why the meaning of these words - "I Exist" gain importance. Because, Life is a beautiful thing that happened to us. Yes, it is confusing sometimes, haunting sometimes, painful sometimes.. But still it is also fun, joy, happiness, love.. most of the times. Isnt existing a beautiful thing? I think it is. But now again there a choice...

But doesnt it give rise to self importance? doesnt it kill the goodness in us? Because, (say) if i am in a sinking ship (poseidon!), i'll be more worried to save 'my' self more than anything else.
Oh yes, It does give rise to self importance and no it doesnt kill goodness in us. Altruism takes birth when we place ourselves in the place of the person for whom we were going to do some 'good'. So when i am in a sinking ship, i cant place another drowning person in my place, because i am also already drowning! So since i already am in that position, i try to save 'My' self than anything else!

Maybe nothing is really wrong. Everything that is labelled 'wrong' has a justifiable reason behind it being NOT wrong, its simply pure statistics that goes against the justifiable reason, i.e, majority of the people are reluctant to accept that reason, and hence it becomes 'wrong'.

Oh great! So if i Steal, then i am doing no wrong?
YES! When i am stealing, i am stealing because either
- I am in dire need for it, and have no money to buy it.
- I have the money, but hell.. why should i waste my money when i can steal it!
- She stole that from me, she should know how if feels to lose something (revenge hunh?).
- Dont blame me.. i am kleptomaniac, so it is justified if i gen 'pick' up things!

Hey not bad! so i can go ahead and steal! right?
NO! What about the person from whom you stole?
- She must have worked so hard to get it.
- She must have been so happy to gain it and losing it may pain her.
- Oh! it was a gift from a person i value the most. How can anyone steal it? (sob)
- God! It was so expensive. It was my bro's and he's gonna kill me!

Wait! Then what am i supposed to do? Should I be self-oriented and go for the 'YES' or should I be good and go for the 'NO'? There is always a choice, and I choose the 'NO'. I choose this choice not because i'm good, but because i know how it feels to lose things.

There is always and always a choice. And a little part of life is to make a choice (own or forced) and live it till its existence is significant.

--Shruti